Suicide Bomber Arrives At Entrance To Paradise

"What are they doing here?" The suicide bomber asked Allah that points to two and fifty victims he had just blown up along with himself. "I thought I was going to Paradise alone."

"Do not let him in!" A dead man named among the newcomers.

"He killed us!" A female victim cried.

Allah, who sat on a golden throne at the entrance to Paradise, with his scepter, which had a strange red button on top, and told the bomber, "It always happens this way."

"But why?" He wanted to know.

Allah gave a scroll which was written the words that he said: "Do the math!"

"I was never good at math," the bomber access. "Please, explain."

"It's really quite simple," Allah told him. "The usual transport velocity from earth to Paradise is a constant. So anyone who dies at the same time arrives here at the same time."

"Oh," sighed bombers, "I did not think so."

"Justice! We demand justice!" The disgruntled crowd confirmed.

"Please, let me continue," Allah advised them. Then he turned his eyes on the bomber. "What did you say on your behalf?"

"Praise be to God," replied the bomber, and fell on his knees. "I killed them for you, Allah."

"I can not remember to ask. Did other causes?"

"Oh, a really good one."

"Do I know everything?" Allah asked.

"Yes you do. God is great!"

"So why can not I know a really good reason to kill people?"

"Infidels!" He shouted. "They are infidels!"

"What is an infidel?" One of the dead child asked his mother.

"One who disagrees with me and my general!" The bomber informed child.

"I can not!" One of the dead men exclaimed, and turned to Allah. "So let me blow him up!"

"Please," Allah replied: "Up here I pass out rewards and punishments."

"So no doubt I've earned an eternal reward in Paradise," the bomber said.

"Never!" The dead crowd demanded.

"I've earned my eternal reward with my life!" The bomber shot back.

"Eternal, no doubt," Allah said. "But there seems to be some disagreement about the location."

"But my superiors assured me that I would go directly to heaven to blow myself up and these infidels."

"I know that" Allah told him. "It is one of the drawbacks of knowing everything. Frankly, I sometimes wish I did not. I get the worst headache." He took a notepad out of a pocket in his gown. "See. I have a list of your advisors. Now, the big question. Who will be in Paradise, you or them?"

"Me?" The bomber said gently.

"Justice! We demand justice!" Amount cried.

"Not to worry," Allah told them. "This is what I specialize in." He turned to suicide bombings again. "What do you infidels?"

"They think different thing than I do, especially on you!"

"Why do you think it is possible for people to believe different things, even about me?"

"Because they are wrong!" The Bombers answered.

"No, because I decided people might think different things."

"You did?"

"Am I almighty?"

"Blessed be God, of course, you are," the bomber said.

"So if I do not wish they could believe different things, I assume you understand that they would not be able to?"

"Oh," the bomber realized. "

"Thank Allah," one of the dead men said. "It's a good point."

"You mean they have the right to disagree with me and my general?" The suicide bomber wanted to know.

"How else could they get away with it?" Allah asked.

"Hmm, I had not thought about it," he complained.

"I know that" Allah said. "Now, maybe you know I have a rule?"

"Oh, lots of them," bomber walked on. "I know them by heart."

"What about the one about not killing?"

"I did not apply to unbelievers!"

"He's guilty!" A man shouted.

"He killed us!" A child screamed.

"Send him to hell!" His deceased mother said, and put his arm around the child.

"We are belonging to the place," Allah said, and turned toward the bombers. "Do you think I made you?"

"Yes you did. God is great!"

"You think I did them?"

"I do not know why, but yes, I must admit you've made everything and everybody."

"Thanks," Allah said, pointing at the dead volume. "What would happen if everyone decided to blow up people who disagree with him or her?"

"There would be even more blessed martyrs," the suicide bomber said.

"You think crazy people!" One dead women called.

"Hold it," Allah said again, closing his eyes with a bit of disruption. "I have come to a decision."

"Then I can enter Paradise?" The bomber suggested and moved on.

"I'm not finished," Allah told him to block the road with his scepter, which was the red button on top.

"Tell it like it is Allah!" A dead man's name.

"Send him to hell - burning forever!" A woman screamed.

"Please," Allah said: "no reason to shout. Remember, I can even take a hint." He looked back at the bombers. "Do we have never had a bomb go off in Paradise?"

"Really?"

"No, this is a very peaceful place. And you know why we've never had a bomb go off?"

"Because it is Paradise?" The bomber said.

"Yes, but there is a second reason."

"Praise be to God, tell me."

"Because I never let a bomber in."

"But I'm done is a bomber," the bomber said. "Now, I am a martyr!"

"Bombs!" A woman screamed.

"No, no, I'm not a bomber anymore!" The bomber shouted.

"Are not you?" Allah asked. "You have decided to be a fiasco, right?"

"My general told me to do it!"

"But you agreed or you would not have done it. Am I right?"

"Praise be to God, you're omniscient."

"Thank you. Then you will understand that when a bomber, always a bomber."

"Forgive me, Allah, I was wrong."

"No, Allah! He is a murderer!" A man in the late crowd called.

"I'm afraid I agree with them," Allah decided.

"With them? With infidel?"

"Please, step aside," Allah said to the bomber. Then he turned up for the victims. "You can come in."

"Thank God!" They said. "Praise be to Allah!"

They saved their former great benefactor, bowed without success.

"But I'm the one who deserves to go to Paradise!" The bomber protested.

"We'll see," Allah said.

When all the people who were blown up had entered Paradise, the bomber said: "Is it my turn to go in?"

"Let's talk about that" Allah said, and moved his finger to the red button on top of his scepter, which was done to control a weed. "I think you said you killed those people for me?"

"Yes, I did."

"You think I let them be born so you can kill them?"

"But look how they turned out!"

"Is it for you to decide, or for me to decide?"

"For you, Allah, I admit it. I was wrong, I am sorry. Forgive me!"

"I forgive you," Allah said, "but I also gave you the freedom to decide who you will be. And I never change the policy Paradise."

"Praise be to Allah, tell me what is it?"

"No bombers, especially suicide bombings, permitted."

With it, he pushed the red button on his scepter and the unfortunate soul dropped to his unexpected destiny.