You have just received the news that your child is now autistic. You are overwhelmed. What can be done?, how did this happen?, how are you going to be able to adjust and cope with the news that you may have suspected, but you still chose not to believe that it could happen to your child and you? You are probably thinking that life has dealt you an unfair burden. How will is affect the rest of the family and relatives?
You are overwhelmed, and your emotions, and thoughts are going in all directions. I understand, I know what it is like to live with my brother, when I was younger. Our family was crushed by the news of my brother and his disorder. There was confusion, blame, shame, guilt and of course, my family was overwhelmed and did not know what was going to happen. Of course there was anger, but no one seemed to know who to blame.
Through the years dealing with parent(s), caregiver(s) who have children with the disorder of autism, I have discovered, many of them are overwhelmed with anger. It is imperative for you to understand that that self-anger only gives you the right to punish yourself.
Learn to overcome being overwhelmed, by trying to remember when you did something that make you feel good. Or the best time someone complimented you. Take time to be quiet inside. Set aside some time to get in touch with yourself and discover what is happening within. Be gentle with yourself to heal the feelings of the emotions that are flooding, and there seem to be no way to stop them.
It takes time to be silent and quiet. It is imperative that you stop and pay attention your emotions. Slow down the running motor that is going strong inside of you. Try to sort your emotions out and deal with them.
Encourage your family to work together as a team. Once you calm down and take steps to be quiet inside, you will be able to be more clear, talk more calmly in a way that is understandable for communication and making good decisions. Take time to listen and hear what other member(s) of your family have to say about the overwhelming news that your child now has autism.
I have learned with my family situation, regarding my brother, there was blame, guilt, shame, confusion and disbelief that this could happen to our family. It did, it was tough. I learned, no one person in the family was to blame for my brother, because he had the disorder. No one was guilty, no one carried the shame, because, I learned, it just happened, there was a reason for it to happen.
As time went on, we slowly healed, made changes, adjustments, life was more challenging, but it did get better with time. I believe time is the key. Emotions are healthy to have, but you must deal with your emotions that are overwhelming and take action to change them and make the situation better.
It might be an excellent plan to network with parent(s), caregiver(s), and forums, groups, and seminars at schools or facilities where they discuss autism, gather information, learn about it, and never give up on your child, because new research and progress is being made.
I feel unconditional love, and encouragement is one of the most important thing you can give your child with autism or any child. As you give unconditional love and encouragement, it helps you ease the pain and heal the overwhelming emotions that come, and go by knowing your child is autistic.
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